Lisa Prosch online

• You can easily get addicted to ice-cold Coca Cola, straight from the can.
• You should not order Pepsi.
• The sandwich does not come from Sandwich, but it’s a pretty little town.
• People from Sheffield are very friendly and generous, seem to be partial to German shepherds and make delicious meals. They think that everything is “luvely” and, in the case of Pete, look like my English professor.
• Sometimes the smallest campsites are the nicest, especially if they have a cat and a pond full of yapping carps.
• You should listen to the locals’ advice and visit the places they recommend. Would never have visited Robin Hood’s Bay or Portpatrick otherwise.
• Scots are outgoing, fun, hospitable and hard-drinking. Their accent is the best on the island.
• The places you visit by chance hide the most fun, this is especially true for Lanark, with its awesome people. And William Wallace married his Marion there, who knew?
• It is not fun to hear of a murderer on the loose and then find a lone stranger next to your spot on the campsite. Even more so if said stranger doesn’t have a tent with him…
• Do go off the road if you see an interesting thing in the landscape surrounding you. The pretty hill you saw could turn out to be Loudoun Hill, said to have witnessed William Wallace’s and Robert the Bruce’s battles.
• Do not, under any circumstances, trust a British’s estimation of time and distance. Everything is “just down the road”, “in walking distance” or will take “only 2 more minutes”. They lie. Those walks you were sure you could handle range from 40 minutes (one way) to two hours (there and back again). And I’m not even kidding. I wish I was.
• Cornish Pies aren’t yummi.
• Weston-Super-(Night-)Mare should be avoided at all cost. Sand Bay down the road, however, is pretty.
• Sometimes names can be misleading. “Maiden Castle” doesn’t boast any maidens, nor is there a castle. Only sheep.
• Land’s End is just that: the end of England’s land to the west.
• Parking is expensive, you have to “Pay and Display” everywhere. If you’re very lucky it’s 20 pence an hour, usually more like 1- 2 pounds.
• Food is equally expensive, two servings of fish and chips will cost you 15 to 18 pounds. WTF?
• Some people you might find out you still like, even if you haven’t seen them in 11 years.
• Visiting a great New Zealander who lives in Wimbledon with his nice Polish girlfriend and their little Maori warrior son is fun.
• A roadtrip is not a relaxing vacation and you’ll be glad once you’re home again. But you will love everything, at least in retrospect.

Tags: Britain, camping, Lanark, Portpatrick, travel